My Tai Chi instructor does shiatsu massage. Sounded like a great challenge, having a man massage me.
I was nervous, dreading it, feeling very vulnerable especially as I lay down, but I wanted it to happen and it didn't involve being naked or anything. (Apparently if they ask you to undress that's a sign that they're dodgy shiatsu people).
I relaxed into it. Lots of gentle rubbing, finger stroking, all nice and then he started pummeling my shoulders with his feet. I sniffed a little. They didn't smell. There wasn't much to say. I lay there and grinned.
I was nervous, dreading it, feeling very vulnerable especially as I lay down, but I wanted it to happen and it didn't involve being naked or anything. (Apparently if they ask you to undress that's a sign that they're dodgy shiatsu people).
I relaxed into it. Lots of gentle rubbing, finger stroking, all nice and then he started pummeling my shoulders with his feet. I sniffed a little. They didn't smell. There wasn't much to say. I lay there and grinned.
The discovery was that I had a lot more tension in my left shoulder and neck than my right. My left hand was much colder as a result. When he started working on that area I had a flashback, no fits thankfully, some subtle squirms.
Overall I felt wonderful after - very relaxed and sleepy. The day after I felt very serious, something wasn't right. I was having a flashback and when I did EMDR a memory came up. I felt my head tense and pulled to the left. Then my shoulder and neck relaxed. The feeling that came with it was that relaxation was a rebellion. My attacker had made me tense now I would say screw him, I'm gonna relax you $%&*&*(^&&*&.
So on the whole a great way to relax. Really great having someone else relax me, no yoga stretching, or tai chi or meditation - just lounging around. Also a great challenge in putting my trust in a man not to hurt me.
The other possibility is the physical memories it might release in discovering where I hold tension and then why. I plan to have several sessions when I get back from Canada in July and then see what the long term benefits could be in managing PTSD.
Stay tuned.
Overall I felt wonderful after - very relaxed and sleepy. The day after I felt very serious, something wasn't right. I was having a flashback and when I did EMDR a memory came up. I felt my head tense and pulled to the left. Then my shoulder and neck relaxed. The feeling that came with it was that relaxation was a rebellion. My attacker had made me tense now I would say screw him, I'm gonna relax you $%&*&*(^&&*&.
So on the whole a great way to relax. Really great having someone else relax me, no yoga stretching, or tai chi or meditation - just lounging around. Also a great challenge in putting my trust in a man not to hurt me.
The other possibility is the physical memories it might release in discovering where I hold tension and then why. I plan to have several sessions when I get back from Canada in July and then see what the long term benefits could be in managing PTSD.
Stay tuned.
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